One month encounting

The past few weeks have honestly flown by. In a weird, overwhelmingly busy way. On Sunday afternoons I have found myself dreading going to CAPSA and starting my hellish schedule all over again. This past Sunday I starting thinking about going back to the group home, getting paid less and working Fridays and Saturdays. At least I would be able to go to church with my family and spend time with them after right?
We had Red Ribbon Week and dare I say it went exceptionally well? (leaving out the part where the PTA president yelled at me over a pinata hmm...). I have been so luck to be surrounded by some of the most amazing youth. Seriously. They may be completely out of control and not care too much about life in general, but they can change the world in their own ways. They impress me.
I think lately I have been getting down on myself, and I am not sure my goal of not dating is the best thing. I am trying to stick to it, only because well, I haven't exactly met anyone that has caught my attention. Then again...have I even caught anyone's eye in the first place..hhhahaa..probably not. I will continue to have faith that something good is ahead, that something is waiting for me that is worth working this hard for. Sometimes I'm okay with waiting and other days I really suck at waiting and I get so blah. I am lucky and I have been incredibly blessed with a crazy and incredible family. I can't complain.
On Halloween I turned in my application for the Master's program at the U. I was a little scared not really knowing if that's what I want let alone if they will even accept me. Part of me (actually the majority of me) just wants to travel and do service projects in South America and different parts around the world, play and not worry about punctuation, read books of my choice, and no more bubble sheets, run whenever I want, backpack up something other than old main hill, wake up at 5 and then fall back to sleep without feeling crappy, and I could go on.
I decided to fast for many reasons. One was to know where to go from here. I feel like I am doing things on my own a lot of the time, at the same time I feel like I never get a chance to be alone and just think. It was good, and I really felt like a came to some conclusions...for me that was like monumental. The power behind a simple prayer and fast always shocks me...always.
This Friday I have a CT scan. I am scared. It's nothing serious, but I feel weird, and kind of just sick of going to the doctor all of the time. I try to keep my mind off of it.
What else? I have really just been loving everything about Logan. I am going to start volunteering pretty soon at FTC with the boys. I quit recently because I didn't have 14 extra hours to work there. So whenever I have a spare hour or two I will just act as a volunteer so that I can take one of the boys to do something fun. :) That totally made my day when I figured this out.
So, this entry seems like melancholy central. It's the halloween candy hangover. Perhaps? I am smiling on the inside...hahaa.